Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Mental Technical Difficulties

Regarding the next few subjects I strongly want to share with you, I have never had so much trouble writing! I have typed, deleted, and typed again until I am back to almost where I was at the beginning.

Playing the role of my own therapist I have analyzed it and I realize I have several stumbling blocks standing in my way. First, I am the type of person who, by nature, takes the long way around to say what could have been said in a shorter, more precise nature. Then, there's the subject matter. I could myself write a book on each of the subjects that I want to bring up, so I am having a real hard time condensing it in a blog form and be able for you to actually "feel" what I am feeling as I wrote it and understand the condition of my mind on the date that the page was posted.

Then, last but most important, has to do with "what state of mind" I am in when writing. I cannot, yet anyway, get to the point of explaining explicitly my mind's condition and how my thought process changes drastically on certain topics when the manic phases start building into a raging volcano, when I am in the deep depression stage.

Well, just wanted you to know I am still here. Going through a few tough weeks, but have hope it will change back to almost normal. {Bipolar--we don't know really what normal is!}

I will leave you with a quote on a subject that has been on my mind. I really like this one!

        "A child's world is fresh and new and beautiful, full of wonder and excitement. It is our misfortune that for most of us that clear-eyed vision, that true instinct for what is beautiful and awe-inspiring, is dimmed and even lost before we reach adulthood." ~Rachel Carson

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